This is it. This is what I did after the kids went to sleep, and this is what I thought about all day while they were awake. Fabric. I love fabric, and making things out of it. I like how colorful it is, and I like how it brightens what is, for me, a bit of a drab life right now. Oh sure, being a stay at home mom is wonderful, amazing, even transcendent. I adore spending all day every day with my kids and watching them achieve every little milestone. I find every piece of their artwork to be perfect, their utterances priceless, and their abilities unparalleled.
Not really. Actually, above everything else, I find being a stay-at-home-mom mind-numbingly boring. There. I said it. Go ahead, judge me. I know I’m supposed appreciate the station I’m at. After all, not everyone can afford to live like we do. Heck, we can’t really afford to live like we do. But putting four kids in daycare? The price would be astronomical. And it’s not like I hate what I do. I don’t. And it’s not that I don’t like spending time with my kids. I just wish that, every once in awhile, I could find something else to talk about besides diapers and sicknesses and Fisher-Price. I wish I could wear exciting clothes and have an exciting hairstyle and take exciting classes and visit exciting places. I’d like to wear heels and skirts and be in charge of someone older than 4.
I think everyone must feel this way sometimes. Even people who do what they love to do every moment of the day must get tired of it to some extent. And I know that one day my kids will grow up and the memories of these days will be more exciting than anything else in my life. But for now I’m treading water in a sea of laundry and sippy cups.
Working moms, I’m sorry if this bothers you. I’ve been told many times before that others would love to be in my position. But rest assured that there are others that would love to be in yours for a little while. And stay-at-home-moms, if you’ve never felt this way, you have my admiration. But if you have, then you have my support.
Now, back to the fabric . . . isn’t it great? It’s for two little boys; one I get to hold every day, and one I’ve never met. I’m glad that, in between folding clothes and cleaning the bathroom, I’ve got something like this to look at and think about. Thank God for hobbies, right? What do you think about while you’re doing those drab little duties that make up your workday? Anyone care to share what makes them excited and, in a sense, keeps them exciting?